Thursday, December 23, 2010

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 22, 2010 Just funnies

Every December it was the same excruciating tradition. Our
family would get up at the crack of dawn, go to a Christmas
tree farm and tromp across acres of snow in search of the
perfect tree. Hours later our feet would be freezing, but
Mom would press on, convinced the tree of her dreams was
"just up ahead."

One year I snapped. "Mom, face it. The perfect tree doesn't
exist. It's like looking for a man. Just be satisfied if
you can find one that isn't dead, doesn't have too many bald
spots and is straight."

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"A man in Sicily had himself arrested so he wouldn't have
to spend the holidays with his relatives. How many guys are
going, 'Why didn't we think of that?'" -Jay Leno

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As we were putting out cookies for Santa on Christmas Eve,
I accidentally dropped one. "No problem," I said, picking
it up and dusting it off before placing it back on the
plate.

"You can't do that," argued my four-year-old.

"Don't worry. Santa will never know."

He shot me a look. "So he knows if I've been bad or good,
but he doesn't know if you dropped a cookie on the floor?"

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 21, 2010 1 Minute Stories

Wonderful Blog with 1 Minute Stories
http://paulocoelhoblog.com/

For more on this interesting author see:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paulo_Coelho

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GIFT-WRAPPING TIPS FOR MEN

* Whenever possible, buy gifts that are already wrapped. If,
when the recipient opens the gift, neither one of you
recognizes it, you can claim that it's myrrh.

* The editors of Woman's Day magazine recently ran an item
on how to make your own wrapping paper by printing a design
on it with an apple sliced in half horizontally and dipped
in a mixture of food coloring and liquid starch. They must
be smoking crack.

* If you're giving a hard-to-wrap gift, skip the wrapping
paper! Just put it inside a bag and stick one of those
little adhesive bows on it. This creates a festive visual
effect that is sure to delight the lucky recipient on
Christmas morning

Your wife: Why is there a Hefty trash bag under the tree?

You: It's a gift! See? It has a bow!

Your wife: (peering into the trash bag) It's a leaf blower.

You: Gas-powered! Five horsepower!

Your wife: I want a divorce.

You: I also got you some myrrh.

In conclusion, remember that the important thing is not what
you give, or how you wrap it. The important thing, during
this very special time of year, is that you save the receipt.

Monday, December 20, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 20, 2010 Talk About Fattening

It's that time of the year when we are out shopping, rushing to get done, and need to stop for a meal. Don't stop for these meals that start at 3000 calories and go up from there to a whopping 8500 calories!
http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2010-12-14/30-deadliest-meals-of-2010-from-applebees-to-the-cheesecake-factory/

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 19, '10 Crazy Christmas Lights

Crazy Christmas lights: scroll down and visit all three pages for more and more
http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2010-12-17/christmas-light-displays-worlds-most-outrageous-overdecorated-houses/
The second from the bottom on the third page has more amazing Christmas Fun available as links from YouTube

If this is your thing visit
http://www.planetchristmas.com/
to find out more about how to do this

Friday, December 17, 2010

Grand Opening Luxury Single Living Community

Today is the ribbon cutting ceremony for our new luxury senior living complex. The Grand Opening will be Sunday December 19 from 9:00 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. The Public is welcome to attend. Com'on down.
http://www.stoneyriverweb.com/

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 17, 2010 Computer Backup

Do you back up? We all know we should, but do we?
Here are some places to start the hunt:
http://www.pcmag.com/article2/0,2817,2288745,00.asp
http://online-data-backup-review.toptenreviews.com/

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I'm the postmaster for a small town in Pennsylvania. One of
my regular customers, Jeff, bought several sheets of newly
released commemorative stamps.

Soon after he left, a woman came in carrying two crisp
sheets of Harry Houdini stamps she'd found in the parking
lot.

The next morning, I gave Jeff the sheets of stamps he'd
lost. "You know," Jeff said to me, "I'm not at all that
surprised the Houdini stamps reappeared."

Fun on the Web Dec 16, 2010 Organize

Happy Birthday Dan!

Organize for Life
http://orgjunkie.com/

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 15, 2010 Free Shpping to Military

Whole Foods announces free overseas shipping of its holiday gift boxes to APO, FPO and DPO addresses. While I don't typically promote stores and such I do applaud the free shipping to soldiers thing so they are getting a plug.

You can pick from:
* The Gift of Grub ($60). Summer sausage, pretzel crisps, aged cheddar cheese straws, peppermint stick chocolate, classic shortbread and gourmet pecans.
* You're Zenzational ($60). Soothing lavender lotion and shower gel, mineral bath salts, a sleep mask, a bath pillow, and even a candle and tea to further calm the soul.
* Get Warm, Get Fuzzy ($50). Specialty coffee, tea and hot chocolate paired with caramel sweetener, fruit-and-nut mix, mocha wafers, biscotti bites and dark chocolate espresso beans.
* You Rock Box o' Choc ($50). Chocolates, dipped sandwich cookies and brownie bites, peanut butter chocolate wafers, chocolate cherry trail mix and hot chocolate.
* Ciao Down ($40). Italian herb pasta sauce, basil pesto, extra virgin olive oil crostini, dry roasted almonds and truffled espresso clusters. Buon Appetito!

http://www.wholefoodsmarket.com/giftbox/


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"The annual 'Christmas Village' in Philadelphia has been
renamed the 'Holiday Village.' In fact, they're not Santa's
reindeer anymore...they're now 'nondenominational venison.'"
~~ Jay Leno


"President Obama has set aside over 180 million acres of
land for polar bears. When Sarah Palin heard about it, she
said, 'Todd, get my gun!'" ~~ Conan O'Brien

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 14, 2010 Luggage Limits

Traveling for the holidays? Check out the luggage limits for your flight here:
http://www.luggagelimits.com/

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As a potential juror in an assault-and-battery case, I was
sitting in a courtroom, answering questions from both sides.
The assistant district attorney asked such questions as: Had
I ever been mugged? Did I know the victim or the defendant?

The defense attorney took a different approach, however.
"I see you are a teacher," he said. "What do you teach?"

"English and theater," I responded.

"I guess I better watch my grammar," the defense attorney
quipped.

"No," I shot back. "You better watch your acting."

When the laughter in the courtroom died down, I was excused
from the case.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 13, 2010 Frozen Car Doors

The longer I am up here the more I appreciate being able to get in my car and get the heat going but what if you can't get the door open? Tips from Accuweather
http://www.accuweather.com/blogs/news/story/42818/winter-temperatures-can-freeze.asp
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My musician son decided to play guitar at his own wedding
reception. That day, tuning his strings was taking longer
than usual. "It's a little harder to do with a ring on,"
he apologized to the waiting guests.

That's when a man called out, "Everything's harder with a
ring on!"

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 12, 2010 Spelling Bee

10 Spelling Bee Sites to Help Your Child
http://www.makeuseof.com/tag/10-spelling-bee-game-websites-helps-child-spell-words/

and check out the Best of Lists too
http://www.makeuseof.com/service/lists/

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My Dad and I were talking the other night about love and
marriage. He told me that he knew as early as their wedding
what marriage to my Mom would be like. It seems the minister
asked my Mom, "Do you take this man to be your husband."
And she said, "I do."

Then the minister asked my Dad, "Do you take this woman to
be your wife," and my Mom said, "He does."

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 11, 2010 Warm Hands

Nothing makes me cold like freezing fingers and toes. Now that we try to use cell phones while we are outside these gloves could be the next best thing to sliced bread.
http://www.freehands.com/categories/Collections/

Of course I still have and use Wristies
http://www.wristies.com/
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While hiking in the mountains one day I came across a gor-
geous gorge that I thought was an echo canyon. I shouted,
"Hello there." But the response sounded to me like, "Hello
where?"

I tried again. "How do you do?"

A moment later the report came back sounding like, "How do
I do what?"

Baffled and amused I decided to give it the ultimate test.
"You're not really an echo canyon, are you?"

The response from the big ditch confirmed my suspicions.
"Brilliant deduction, Einstein."

Friday, December 10, 2010

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 8, 2010 Online Shopping Codes

Still shopping?

Promo codes for Kohls online from 12-9 to 12-12
20% on $100 or more code is HOLLY 20
15% on any purchase code is HOLLY 15

Lane Bryant Online
Today only 006953690
for Pants & Jeans at $19.99
and 50% off Outerwear

WHH9727 ending 12-17
Free Shipping and 25% OFF
at Coldwater Creek

Monday, December 6, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 6, 2010 Food for Thought

Much of the social history of the Western world over the past three decades has involved replacing what worked with what sounded good.
- Thomas Sowell

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Friday, December 3, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 3 '10 Martinis

Having trouble finding my favorite mixers up here so I guess I have to learn to mix from scratch. Brought some supplies from the last time I ran into Milwaukee but they won't last long. This might be a place to find a few ideas.
http://skinnytinis.blogspot.com/

Does anyone have a favorite bar tending website?

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 2 '10 Sick of Recorded Messages

Need a company phone number? Other tips or information?
GetHuman is the ultimate consumer tool with phone numbers,
shortcuts, reviews, tips, and more for companies worldwide.
http://gethuman.com/

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"California has no money. Our budget situation is a mess.
So a state representative introduced a bill to legalize
marijuana and he claims it will raise almost a billion and
a half dollars a year in taxes. And another $3 billion in
Cheetos sales." -Jimmy Kimmel

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Fun on the Web Dec 1 '10 Answers

Clear answers for common questions
http://www.wisegeek.com/

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Although I had arrived 20 minutes early for my one o'clock
doctor's appointment, I watched patient after patient dis-
appear into the various rooms. Now, I know things happen,
and that more serious issues are typically dealt with first,
so I was able to accept that those coming in after me were
seen first, But when I was still sitting in the waiting room
1 1/2 hours later, I'd had enough and had become pretty
irate.

Fortunately, as I got up and went to the receptionist, I
calmed down enough to handle it without anger.

Instead I calmly said, "I know my son's appointment was for
one o'clock. Can you tell me if that was a.m. or p.m.?"